Top 12 Things NOT To Say To A Cop

l. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.

2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar
detector wasn't plugged in.

3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep
up with me. Good job!

5. Are you Andy or Barney?

6. I thought you had to be in relatively good
physical condition to be a police officer.

7. You're not gonna check the trunk are you?

8. I pay your salary!

9. Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer
only gave me a warning too!

10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just
so one of us does.

11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I
know there are no other cars around.
That's how far ahead of me they are.

12. When the Officer says "Son, Your eyes look red,
have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't
respond with, "Officer, your eyes looked
glazed, have you been eating donuts?




--
"Big Al" Liebmann
"right tidy,lefty loosey"

Been there a few times! :)
--
MrWillys aka HRB

Paint don't make 'em any faster!

One More... When he askes you ..Do know why I pulled you over, Ask him if it`s the 100lbs of cocain in the trunk.
--
If it`s too loud...yer too freakin old

When you're asked for "license and registration" tell the friendly officer, "sorry, the last cop didn't give them back yet."
--
MrWillys aka HRB

Paint don't make 'em any faster!

One more:
"Officer, I was in a hurry because I was late for the rendezvouz with your wife"

How did you see I wasn't wearing in the dark? No I don't want a speeding ticket too.........
Just write the ticket, my wife will take care of the lecture.
--
Mike J

Lets try this again............. How did you see I wasn't wearing a seatbelt in the dark? No, I don't want a speeding ticket too......
--
Mike J

Does this have anything to do with tickets the state trooper's ball????

Or:

Gee do you really know how silly you look with that hat and reflector glasses?

How come it took you 5 minutes to get out of the car; seat belt hung up in the donut bag again?

Show me the FCC license and last calibration sticker for that radar. This one CAN work if you know your stuff.

--
Carl
Automotive gold is everywhere; you just have to learn how to dig for it

How about when he opens his ticket book. and you tell him you'll take a burger and fries. and biggie size it.


Rick
--
awsum34

Remember the only dumb question is the one you don't ask.

Just out-run em. 9 out of 10 Californians do. Ever watch COPS? When they are caught, the famous last line " I aint did nuttin"...LOL
--
If it`s too loud...yer too freakin old

ok being a cop from new jersey all i have to say is...you all need new material...lol not bad though..i`ll give all of you a 7..combined of course....hey wheres slammin`s entry???

17 replies and not one from Grant?!!! Take note of this date, he must be sick in bed. Grant, you need some chicken soup or something? LOL
--
Your "top-less" cruzn buddy, Denise

ADD THIS TO THE 12.. Gee officer-I had to drive, I am too drunk to walk!
--
Steeldeuce

You want me to walk that line?
with out a net!

Had to hurry home and tell my wife i'm pregnant,,
(well it works for the ladies)


Rick
--
awsum34

Remember the only dumb question is the one you don't ask.

15 years ago, I my sister-in-law went into contractions while visiting. I dove her to the hospital at +100mph on the highway (in a 50) and 70-80mph in a 30, thru the city of London. Boy did I have fun and a valid excuse. I felt like Starsky & Hutch. Never saw a cop but was ready for one.

My wife got stopped 10 years ago for doing 20mph over the limit and she talked her way out of it. Never had a ticket in 25 years of driving. The cop said, "mam why are you speeding so fast"? She replied, my husband usually picks my son up from hockey practice after work, but his car broke last night and it went into the garage. It's starting to get dark, I have to pick up my husband at his work first and then pickup my son. My son is waiting outside the hockey arena, he is only 8 years old and alone. The cop said, "you better get going and put his ticket book away". My wife has never had a ticket and my son has never played hockey, while he was a tremendous ball player and made it to the top 32 in the world junior 9-ball championships, in Japan last year.

Your car budy from ONTARIO.......LARY

state troopers don't have any balls, policemen do.
--
That's my story and I'm stickn to it

Okay, I'm posting this up here at the cop shop - wonder if anyone (besides me) will find it funny ?? Ya think?
Liz
--
Hot Rod Liz

True story;
Guy comes out of bar arguing with his wife gets in his car and proceeds to back into my buddys car,then takes off over the curb and goes down wrong side of the street. Cop sees the whole thing and pulls him over and asks the driver if he has been drinking to which he replied "hell yes I been drinkin what do you think I am, a stunt driver?

One more. WoW, this is about the 3rd day in a row for that uniform, ain't it pal?

blksheep....in Charlotte

Yea,, so whats yer problem!!
No, I aint goin to fast, Them other people are going to slow
--
Life is what happens while your making other plans.

Slammin's probably thinkin that this will be posted in some donut shop with his name on it....LOL
I've never been able to talk my way out of a ticket...guess it's the guilty look I can't hide...
Fred P
--
Fred P.

I didn't stop because last week my wife ran off with a cop and I was afraid you were bringing her back.